Ten Favors a Dog Asks From a Man - Author Unknown
1- My life lasts between ten to fifteen years. Every separation from you means suffering for me. Think about this before you decide whether or not to take me!
2- Give me time to understand what you are asking from me.
3- Instill confidence in me - I thrive on it!
4- Do not be angry with me for a long time and do not lock me up for punishment!You have your work, your pleasure, your joy - I have onlyyou.
5- Talk often to me! Even if I do not understand you completely, I do understand the tone of your voice when you talk to me.
6- Know that, no matter how I am being treated, I shall never forget it!
7- Keep in mind, before you hit me , that my jaws could crush the knuckles of your hand with ease, but that I do not make use of them.
8- Before you scold me when working with me, consider: perhaps I am uncomfortable from digesting my last meal; perhaps I was exposed to the sun too long; or perhaps I have a wornout heart.
9- Take care of me when I am old -- you too are going to be old one day.
10- Be with me when my going gets rough. Everything is easier for me when you are beside me.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Ten Favors a Dog Asks From a Man - Author Unknown
Posted by Laura at 1:39 PM
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Two blonde girls were working for the city public worksdepartment.
One would dig a hole and the other would follow behind herand fill the hole in.. They worked up one side of the street, then downthe other, then moved on to the next street, working furiously all daywithout rest, one girl digging a hole, the other girl filling it inagain.
An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn'tunderstand what they were doing. So he asked the hole digger,
'I'mimpressed by the effort you two are putting in to your work, but I don'tget it -- why do you dig a hole, only to have your partner follow behindand fill it up again?'
The hole digger wiped her brow and sighed, 'Well, I suppose itprobably looks odd because we're normally a three-person team.
But todaythe girl who plants the trees called in sick."
Posted by Laura at 11:27 AM
Monday, October 26, 2009
One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river,her thimble fell into the river.
When she cried out, the Lord appearedand asked, 'Why are you crying?'
The seamstress replied that herthimble had fallen into the water and that she needed it to help herhusband in making a living for their family.
The Lord dipped His handinto the water and pulled up a golden thimble set with sapphires.'Is this your thimble?' the Lord asked
The seamstress replied, 'No.'The Lord again dipped into the river. He held out a golden thimblestudded with rubies.'Is this your thimble?' the Lord asked.
Again, the The Lord reacheddown again and came up with a leather thimble.'Is this your thimble ?' the Lord asked.
The seamstress replied, 'Yes'The Lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and gave her all threethimbles to keep, and the seamstress went home happy.
Some years later, the seamstress was walking with her husband alongthe riverbank, and her husband fell into the river and disappearedunder the water.
When she cried out, the Lord again appeared and askedher, 'Why are you crying?' 'Oh Lord, my husband has fallen into theriver!'
The Lord went down into the water and came up with George Clooney.'Is this your husband?' the Lord asked.'Yes,' cried the seamstress.
The Lord was furious. 'You lied! That isan untruth!'
The seamstress replied, 'Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is amisunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to George Clooney, youwould have come up with Brad Pitt.Then if I said 'no' to him, you would have come up with my husband.Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I'mnot in the best of health and would not be able to take care of allthree husbands, so THAT'S why I said 'yes' to George Clooney.
And so the Lord let her keep him.
The moral of this story is:Whenever a woman lies, it's for a good and honorable reason, and inthe best interest of others. That's our story, and we're sticking toit.
Posted by Laura at 11:42 AM
Friday, October 23, 2009
A couple was invited to a swanky costume party. The Mrs. got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He being a devoted husband protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need for his good time being spoiled by not going.
So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain and, as it was still early, decided to go the party.
Since her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him.
She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice woman he could, and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife sidled up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his current partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new babe that had just arrived.
She let him go as far as he wished , naturally, since he was her husband. Finally, he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed. So off they went to one of the cars and had a quickie.
Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away, went home, put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behavior. She was sitting up reading when he came in, and she asked what kind of a time he had.
He said: "Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there." -
"Did you dance much ?" -
"I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening.
But you're not going to believe what happened to the guy I loaned my costume to...."
Posted by Laura at 12:05 PM
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Posted by Laura at 10:13 AM
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
I am absolutely in LOVE with some of the craft ideas I've seen for halloween. I'm determined to make a few but time is running out quickly.
I just found this one today, how cute are these!!! At my old house, we could have as many as 300 trick or treaters, not the case where we are now, I'm not expecting any at all! These would be great though just to fill with candy corn for friends.
I'm also a bit obsessed with these. I'm trying to figure out if I actually have to go to a cake store to get the edible markers though. I know Michaels would have them, but I would rather just pick one up when I do my grocery shopping.
Finally, here's a roundup with several cute cute ideas!
Posted by Laura at 9:53 AM
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
I missed a couple kitties last weekend in my picture taking extravaganza, so here's the guys I missed via cell phone pics.
A terrible picture of Molly and Lucy. Sisters from another mister. Molly is on top of the nightstand, Lucy underneath. I knew as soon as I went to get a real camera, they would bolt so cell phone was my only option. They look exactly alike, I still have issues with telling them apart.
Posted by Laura at 9:33 AM
Monday, October 19, 2009
Halloween is coming!
A man is walking home alone late one foggy night... when behind him he hears:
Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.
Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him
He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him.
However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping
on his heels, the terrified man runs.Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps..
With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door.
Bumping and clapping toward him.The man screams and reaches for something, anything, but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup!
Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket...and,
(hopefully you're ready for this!!!)
The coffin stops
Posted by Laura at 12:32 PM
Saturday, October 17, 2009
The mid-Atlantic region has seen nothing but rain and cold dreary weather for days! I've been planted on the sofa with the remote and a book all day and I must say it's been wonderful! I'm more than halfway through this month's book club pick - The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown and I've had no shortage of snuggle buddies!
My desk chair has been kept very warm by these two big kids!
Killian, wondering if it's bedtime yet!
Lucy can see everything from her perch on the end of the sofa, if only she had the energy to open her eyes!!!
Posted by Laura at 7:44 PM
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
This was in my inbox following the 3 day weekend and I thought it was great!
A woman was in town on a shopping trip. She began her day finding the mostperfect shoes in the first shop and a beautiful dress on sale in the second.In the third, everything had just been reduced by 50 percent when her mobilephone rang.It was a female doctor notifying her that her husband had just been in aterrible car accident and was in critical condition and in the ICU.The woman told the doctor to inform her husband where she was and that she'dbe there as soon as possible. As she hung up she realized she was leavingwhat was shaping up to be her best day ever in the boutiques.
She decided toget in a couple of more shops before heading to the hospital.She ended up shopping the rest of the morning, finishing her trip with a cupof coffee and a beautiful chocolate cake slice, compliments of the last shop.She was jubilant.Then she remembered her husband.
Feeling guilty, she dashed to the hospital.She saw the doctor in the corridor and asked about her husband's condition.The lady doctor glared at her and shouted, 'You went ahead and finished yourshopping trip didn't you! I hope you're proud of yourself! While you wereout for the past four hours enjoying yourself in town, your husband has beenlanguishing in the Intensive Care Unit! It's just as well you went ahead andfinished, because it will more than likely be the last shopping trip youever take! For the rest of his life he will require round-the-clock care. And hewill now be your career!'
The woman was feeling so guilty she broke down and sobbed.The lady doctor then chuckled and said, 'I'm just pulling your leg. He'sdead. Show me what you bought.'
Posted by Laura at 12:36 PM
Monday, October 12, 2009
Had a fairly busy weekend. We did a craft show at Pickering Creek on Sunday so we were putting tables together all day Saturday to get ready for the show. Turns out, we didn't need to rush, because we didn't sell any! It actually didn't look like anyone was buying anything! So we weren't the only vendors feeling slighted. It was a free show so we weren't out anything except our time. I did get to see this beautiful Great Horned Owl there. I do love an Owl!
I picked up some supplies over the weekend because I wanted to make a quick black feather wreath like they've been selling at Pier 1. Didn't exactly want to spend $35 on the wreath though, ya know? Went to my local dollar tree and got 2 boas, a black and a red and I also got some more skeleton garland to cut apart. JoAnn's had the styrofoam wreath which I had to pay $4 for, that was unfortunate. I guess that's what happens when you're in a hurry. I also picked up a great black spider though, I didn't mind paying $4 for him. :o) Here's the outcome.
Very easy. Just fastened one end of each of the boas to the styrofoam wreath and wrapped them both around. My black boa was thicker, which is great, I just wanted the red more or less as an accent. It worked out almost perfectly, just had to move the boas around in a few places to get them spread. I didn't even have to paint the wreath underneath, the boas covered great. Took and cut apart my garland and fastened it with wires and the same with the spider. I'm quite happy with the spooky effect it gives my front door.
Of course I had to show off my white pumpkin in my entryway. I do love a white pumpkin. This guy will be coming apart at the end of the season to share some seeds with me so I can grow my own (and not overpay!) next year.
Posted by Laura at 5:01 PM
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
I just loved this commentary from the flylady. As women we have a constant need to 'fix' things. Do you ever think that sometimes when your friends call and complain, they just want to be 'heard'? I've been trying to work on this. So often, they just want an ear, not a fix. Enjoy.
To Fix or Not to Fix - That is the Question
For years FlyLady and I have spent most mornings on the telephone talking about SHE's, what makes us tick, why do we behave in a certain way and what can we teach to helpeveryone to FLY. Recently we were talking about a certain personality trait that seems to be very prevalent among most SHE's - our need to "Fix" things, situations, people and problems. The strange thing is that we are drawn to fix other people's problems instead of our own. Is this because we don't want to acknowledge our own issues or is it a way for us to feel better about ourselves?
I have spent a lot of time thinking about this and also doing quite a bit of self reflection, I consider my self to be a mostly reformed fixer that falls off the wagon occasionally!! Through my journey down memory lane I have determined that there are two main roads that we will travel towards fixing something. We will either choose the road that is self-less or we will choose the road that is selfish. Don't get stuck on the negativity of selfish, let me explain more:
The self-less road is when we attempt to fix something or someone because we truly believe that our help will contribute to fixing whatever the problem at hand is. We have no ego tied into the fixing, we are only in it to help. Your best friend has to move out of her home in three days and you drop everything to go and help her get it done - there is nothing in it for you other than to help a friend in need.
The selfish road is when we have some type of personal investment into the fixing of the problem. The outcome or resolution of the problem will affect us and therefore we put ourselves right in the middle of fixing things. The word selfish has a negative connotation attached to it and we can't be afraid of that, we have to embrace it. Your best friend has gotten into an argument with two other friends in your circle. You get involved because their argument affects you and you try to fix things. If you get down and dirty honest with yourself in this example - you really get involved because you don't want your circle to be in turmoil because it takes away from what you need from them. Generally when we approach things from the selfish perspective we get burned!
We have to be able to understand when we are attempting to fix things why we want to help. This will save you pain, embarrassment, frustration and anger for yourself and from others.
When we put ourselves in the position of being the "fixer" we find that people will turn to us in the future for help and we all like to feel needed. The problem with this is that webegin to define ourselves by what we can fix and control versus who we really are. We are not in the position to help others until we help ourselves first. This means you can't teach others to love themselves until you love yourself first. Attempting to fix everyone else's issues before your own is not loving yourself. It is a way to hide behind someone's else's pain and hurt to disguise your own.
When you find yourself wanting to get involved in something that may not be your place you need to take a step back and ask yourself "Why do I want to get involved? Do I have something valuable to add or contribute to a resolution?" Sometimes when we get involved in the "fixing" we take away from the rightful path that the players involved needed to travel. Maybe the individuals involved need to feel pain or hurt to come away from the moment learning something about others or themselves. If we interrupt that path did we really fix anything?
Part of Finally Loving Yourself is recognizing things about yourself that you may not like, the beauty is that we get to work on ourselves as we are always a work in progress not perfection!!
Posted by Laura at 2:07 PM
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
So I've jumped back on the flylady bandwagon. For those of you who aren't familar, www.flylady.org. It's a great thing. She tells you how to spend 15 minutes at a time getting control of various areas of your life. It all starts with making sure your kitchen sink sparkles when you go to bed at night. Mine, she does sparkle, for tonight at least.
Posted by Laura at 8:22 PM
Sunday, October 4, 2009
I keep seeing all of these halloween trees on display with the cutest ornaments! I'd love to have one, but right now, I don't want to spend $40 just on a black tree and still have to decorate it! A-ha! Inspiration to get my crafting mojo back. So yesterday the lovely Karen came over and we made our own creepy halloween trees.
If you decide to build a tree of your own, please post a link in my comments, I would love to see your take on this project!
Posted by Laura at 8:57 AM
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Because I have a large place in my heart for animal rescue, I found this and wanted to share it:
A RESCUERS ANSWERING MACHINE: Hello: You have reached ___-____, Tender Hearts Rescue. Due to the high volume of calls we have been receiving, please listen closely to the following options and choose the one that best describes you or your situation:
Press 1 if you have a 10-year-old dog and your 15-year-old son has suddenly become allergic and you need to find the dog a new home right away.
Press 2 if you are moving today and need to immediately place your 150 pound, 8-year-old dog.
Press 3 if you have three dogs, had a baby and want to get rid of your dogs because you are the only person in the world to have a baby and dogs at the same time.
Press 4 if you just got a brand new puppy and your old dog is having problems adjusting so you want to get rid of the old one right away.
Press 5 if your little puppy has grown up and is no longer small and cute and you want to trade it in for a new model.
Press 6 if you want an unpaid volunteer to come to your home TODAY and pick up the dog you no longer want.
Press 7 if you have been feeding and caring for a "stray" for the last three years, are moving and suddenly determine it's not your dog.
Press 8 if your dog is sick and needs a vet but you need the money for your vacation.
Press 9 if you are elderly and want to adopt a cute puppy who is not active and is going to outlive you.
Press 10 if your relative has died and you don't want to care for their elderly dog because it doesn't fit your lifestyle.
Press 14 if you are calling at 6 a.m. to make sure you wake me up before I have to go to work so you can drop a dog off on your way to work.
Press 15 to leave us an anonymous garbled message, letting us know you have left a dog in our yard in the middle of January, which is in fact, better than just leaving the dog with no message.
Press 16 if you are going to get angry because we are not going to take your dog that you have had for fifteen years, because it is not our responsibility.
Press 17 if you are going to threaten to take your ten year old dog to be euthanized because I won't take it.
Press 18 if you're going to get angry because the volunteers had the audacity to go on vacation and leave the dogs in care of a trusted volunteer who is not authorized to take your personal pet.
Press 19 if you want one of our PERFECTLY trained, housebroken, kid and cat friendly purebred dogs that we have an abundance of.
Press 20 if you want us to take your dog that has a slight aggression problem, i.e. has only bitten a few people and killed your neighbor's cats.
Press 21 if you have already called once and been told we don't take personal surrenders but thought you would get a different person this time with a different answer.
Press 22 if you want us to use space that would go to a stray to board your personal dog while you are on vacation, free of charge, of course.
Press 23 if it is Christmas Eve or Easter morning and you want me to deliver an eight week old puppy to your house by 6:30 am before your kids wake up.
Press 24 if you have bought your children a duckling, chick or baby bunny for Easter and it is now Christmas and no longer cute.
Press 25 if you want us to take your female dog who has already had ten litters, but we can't spay her because she is pregnant again and it is against your religion.
Press 26 if you're lying to make one of our younger volunteers feel bad and take your personal pet off your hands.
Press 27 if your cat is biting and not using the litter box because it is declawed, but you are not willing to accept the responsibility that the cat's behavior is altered because of your nice furniture.
Press 28 if your two year old male dog is marking all over your house but you just haven't gotten around to having him neutered.
Press 29 if you previously had an outdoor only dog and are calling because she is suddenly pregnant.
Press 30 if you have done "everything" to housebreak your dog and have had no success but you don't want to crate the dog because it is cruel.
Press 31 if you didn't listen to the message asking for an evening phone number and you left your work number when all volunteers are also working and you are angry because no one called you back.
Press 32 if you need a puppy immediately and cannot wait because today is your daughter's birthday and you forgot when she was born.
Press 33 if your dog's coat doesn't match your new furniture and you need a different color or breed.
Press 34 if your new love doesn't like your dog and you are too stupid to get rid of the new friend (who will dump you in the next month anyway) instead of the dog.
Press 35 if you went through all these 'options' and didn't hear enough. This press will connect you to the sounds of tears being shed by one of our volunteers who is holding a discarded old dog while the vet mercifully frees him from the grief of missing his family.
~Author Unknown, but much appreciated
Posted by Laura at 12:00 PM